Pathetic attempt at a decent introduction

First of all, for the sake of setting the tone, I feel that you should know I nearly named this blog "How many calories are in a booger?" Back when my oldest daughter was still a toddler (with a cold) I pondered this question. I did not ingest any boogers but I'm sure you can put together how this sprang to mind at all.

My history is long and boring, but the Cliff's Notes version is that I was underweight until I was pregnant with my first child. I had a naturally high metabolism that let me eat anything and everything that I wanted and I still stayed under 100 pounds. At the time, I was 5'7''. Since birthing the aforementioned child, I have lost an inch of height, gone up two shoe sizes and put on a bit of weight. I topped off at 172 with my second pregnancy and was mortified when I didn't lose any of it after the birth of my second daughter. I mean, shouldn't I have lost at least an immediate 8 pounds? I ended up in the 168 vicinity until April 2008, when I finally had enough.

My first weight loss step was to cut out meat entirely. I have a history of high cholesterol in my family and I didn't want to be the next "heart attack at 38". My dad survived. My aunt didn't. Removing meat was the easiest and quickest way to make an impact. And it worked. I lost 20 pounds in 2 months while my husband was away on business. When he came home, however, I slowly began regaining weight until October 2008 when a very stressful Autumn took its toll on my eating habits. I was too depressed to exercise during the winter and struggled with SAD ("The Winter Blahs"). I wrote during the time in my paper journal that I was 151.8 pounds and was disgusted with myself. Still, I maintained that general weight until this summer when we bought our first house.

I don't really know what went wrong there, other than maybe I'm having the molasses metabolism that comes with turning 30. I'm more active now than I have been in a long time, despite losing access to the gym, sauna and pool that came with the apartment we were previously living in. Still, my weight has "ballooned" to 158.4, as of yesterday. I can't really complain because I'm still 14 pounds from my "heavier than I've ever been" weight. It's hard for me to write these numbers because I've been checking out other weight-loss blogs for support and camaraderie but I'm finding people who are 200+ pounds. It makes me feel like I don't have a right to be unhappy with my weight. The fact is that I am, I'm still in the overweight BMI and I still have bits o' Nicole sticking out in places I don't care to be sticking out from. (I'm talking to you, Back Boobs.) While I don't have the long journey ahead (or behind) me that a lot of other bloggers do, I'm still in the same boat-- struggling with numbers while trying to find the time and motivation to take control of the situation.